Purging

Daily Battle

If you've got a stylish wardrobe, the battle to be understood is merely a stroll in the park.

Faded nostalgia

bite the bullet.

swallow the pills.

accept a lesser life.

step closer to normalcy;

and away from happiness.

what if a life with delusional meaning is

better than a life with none at all?

Today I wondered:

do we have less power to shape ourselves than to shape our children? If has always been a question of nurture versus nature--but is there a missing component: free will. To what extent can we choose who we want to be--do we have the ability to change who we want to be? We live in a society that assumes free will.

yesterday:
I came to the conclusion that emotion is not a fault per se. Emotion may have no place in important discussions, but it is by no means illogical. Emotion is darwinian logic--the simplest, most basic logic of survival. Since we all share emotions--and are emotional beings--often what makes sense emotionally makes sense logically.

Hemingway

shit days

I want to shatter this depression,
take a machete to the suffocating fog
that haunts me.

I want to do something, run away,
take pills, smoke cigarettes, crash cars,
do drugs, break glass, punch windows,
rebel, scream, cuss. I want to kick doors,
destroy everything, cut my hair, run and
bike and drink, and fight and be violent
and watch porn make art and then do it
all again.

I want to something drastic

but I can't do it;
I don't want to.

even if I did, I would
I would probably get tired,
yawn and go watch TV.

too sick to enjoy life.
too sane to destroy life.

deadlocked
in a battle of thoughts

Cracking through the Hardship

LIFELIKE Feat. YOTA & NAMEBRAND - "Love Emulator" - Original Mix by LIFELIKE

these nights

I hope I
never become
a drunkard
or become
a smoker
Even if
statistics
tell rough tales
and even
if the pain
can always
be intense,
these moments
come at a
cost, of time
and wellbeing.

I have a
family.
they care and
think about
my wellness.
That's more than
many people
can say of
their own lives.

I consider
my life a
privileged.
life. And I
often try
to remind
myself to
be thankful.

letting go
can be hard
but I am
trying to
dismiss my
selfishness

you have the mercedes

ambitious asians
fighting for the prestige
and the six figures

now you have the car,
seventy grand down the drain;
now what do you do?

entire lives wasted
owned by objects, caught in their
desperate searches.

the price of happiness

you'll probably never know
who you are,
and what you're made of,
until you've spent some time
destroying yourself.